FOUR MONTHS FOR A MUNCH

                                           

Luis Suarez sinks his immense buck-tooth into the flesh of an opposing player. We’ve heard that before; it’s nothing new.

Luis Suarez cops a 4-month ban, a 9-game international football ban, a 4-month stadium ban (apparently applicable anywhere in the world). We have sort of heard that before too.

For the third time in his career, the super-talented Uruguayan striker, top goalscorer of the Premier League in the 2013/2014 season, multiple Barclays Premier League Player of the month and Barclays Premier League Player of the Year award winner cops a lengthy ban.

For a second season in a row, he will miss crucial matches for Liverpool FC - who have qualified for the Champions League for the first time in Lord-knows-how-long years and need all their key men now more than ever. He hasn’t done himself or his agent any favours as far as a transfer to either FC Barcelona or Real Madrid is concerned as well. So why always him? (Apologies to Mario Balotelli)

OK fair enough, Zinedine Zidane suffered a long ban when he rammed his shiny dome into Marco Materazzi’s chest in the 2006 World Cup final…but the world and every breathing football fan in it knew Zizou was retiring after that game, so what was the point?

On top of that, FIFA handed him (Zinedine Zidane) the Golden Ball, as Diego Maradona correctly pointed out recently. I have not seen many players with cannibalistic tendencies, but I remember Jermaine Defoe biting Javier Mascherano’s shoulders as if sweaty Argentine flesh tasted as good as a Big Mac. He got away with only a slap on the wrist.

So the polemics remain; is FIFA being uncharacteristically severe because the culprit is the notorious Luis Suarez? Or were the independent disciplinary committee of the governing body jolted into action by Giorgio Chiellini’s scathing criticism?

In the same World Cup (Brazil 2014), France have gotten away with more murder than an Ecuadorian drug cartel. As examples, consider Olivier Giroud and Mamadou Sakho’s murderous Jon Jones type elbows on Ecuadorian defenders whose only crimes were to defend corners. Mamadou Sakho’s in particular would’ve had someone like Sergio Busquets rolling around for days or at least from one side of the pitch to the other… and FIFA would’ve acted.

Against Honduras, Paul Pogba retaliated brutally when Wilson Palacios fouled him (The same offence against Diego Simeone got David Beckham a red card…and fame). Of course Paul Pogba got away with it. In a cruel twist in the wheel of fate, Wilson Palacios seemingly fouled an overreacting Paul Pogba in his own box. He was sent off and France scored the ensuing penalty.

So it won’t be too far from the truth to assume that Luis Suarez is being targeted, right? Right.  He brings it on himself, right? I mean this is the same Luis Suarez who promised to everything but God to be of good behaviour after munching a chunk of Branislav Ivanovic’s arm, right? This is the same Luis Suarez who thought a hug after a game was enough to win empathy after doing the Dracula on Otman Bakkal, right? This is the same Luis Suarez who prevented Ghana’s Dominic Adiyiah from making history by clawing away a goal-bound header by the striker, right? 

THE ONE MAN WHO PREVENTED GHANA from an historical semi-final appearance in the World Cup 2010? Ah,well, I guess he deserves his ban then…