THE LENNY BRISCOE II REPORT

                                            Luis Suarez sinks his immense buck-tooth into the flesh of an opposing player. We’ve heard that before; it’s nothing new. Luis Suarez cops a 4-month ban, a 9-game international football ban, a 4-month stadium ban (apparently applicable anywhere in the world). We have sort of heard that before too. For the third time in his career, the super-talented Uruguayan striker, top goalscorer of the Premier League in the 2013/2014 season, multiple Barclays Premier League Player of the month and Barclays Premier League Player of the Year award winner cops a lengthy ban. For a second season in a row, he will miss crucial matches for Liverpool FC - who have qualified for the Champions League for the first time in Lord-knows-how-long years and need all their key men now more than ever. He hasn’t done himself or his agent any favours as ...

In 2009, Paris, the venue, France faced Ireland in a World Cup play-off. Thierry Henry handled the ball twice before setting up William Gallas for the winner that put France through for the 2010 World Cup held in South Africa. The whole football world went haywire. Thierry Henry had gone from hero to zero. He was being demonized by every pundit, analyst, and self-righteous commentator across God's green Earth. It was as if he had never set the Premier League alight with silky skills. It was as if he had never won all the medals football has to offer. It was as if admitting to the handball wasn't enough. You know why? Well, because cheating against the Irish to deprive them a place at the World Cup(as if that was even guaranteed) made every other positive achievement by Henry(and indeed France) count for nought. Well, two years on and Mr Trappatoni's team faced Armenia. Both teams in a position to reach the play-offs in a bid to qualify for Euro 2012. With the score at 0-0 ...